"Wrigley Field, third base..."
"Golden Eagle, this is Echo Base. The laundry is dry. I repeat, the laundry is dry."
Pick up the phone and before the other person can say anything, say "Hi -- can I speak to Joe, please?"
"Go ahead Caller, you're on the air"
"Hello, the person you are calling right now is unavailable and the answering machine is on the fritz. This is the refrigerator. Please leave a message after the beep and I'll stick it to myself with a magnet."